children

here is a poem I wrote for my daughter. She is the only gift I need for Father’s Day and I feel in need to celebrate her on this day.

I will never forget holding you for the first time

When I reached out to take you into my arms

It felt as if I was taking into my possession

The world’s most priceless gift

Like pulling something from between the stars

Out of the darkness you emerged and were welcomed into existence

You barely made a sound

When I held you I looked into your eyes

They looked so wide and it was as if you were pulling everything into them at once

You seemed to stare at me directly

It was from the moment that we bonded together permanently

To look at you knowing you came from me

To see that part of myself like an out of body experience

And we just continued staring at each other

You with your small features and spotless soul

We knew each other and we are each other

And you may carry me on with you someday

The code of me passed on perhaps

Along with that of my ancestors

And now years have passed on

Time, like a thief, has taken it from me

In what feels like the second I closed my eyes

Between staring at you

Though you still carry the features of that little one I held

I see the age of you becoming more and more apparent every day

You hold so much beauty in such a small frame

And your joy and your kindness moves me to tears when I think about you

The bond between you and I has grown deeper than I thought imaginable

Those moment’s that sneak up on me and hit me the deepest

The ones that are knowing and far more ethereal than of this world

You teach me more about myself than I thought would be possible

And I’m humbled to be called your father

Some nights I quietly step into your room as you lay asleep

And I watch you breath in and out

In those moments of such quiet peace

Your face looks exactly as it did when I first saw you

So beautiful, serene, and wise beyond your time

I know my bond for you will never break

You will always be my little one even when we are both older

My hope for you is that you continue to be brave

And to be the beautiful you that you are

When I am gone someday I hope you always think of me fondly

And have thousands of memories to cull up when you are sad

I will always be with you

I will always love you

I will always be your father

You will always be my daughter

You will always be the greatest part of my life

It has been a year since part 1. Which you can find here:

https://kloipy.wordpress.com/2012/04/05/10-things-that-shaped-my-youth-part-1/

That post got Freshly Pressed and due to that I met some awesome people and had over 400 comments with people sharing some of the things that shaped their lives. It was so much fun and so cool to see how many people connected with it.

And seeing as that I titled the first one Part 1, I figured (even though a year later) I should at some point follow that up with part 2.

So without further ado; here is Part 2.

Let me know more of what helped make you you in the comments!

10. Monty Python’s Flying Circus

Connecting instantly with me was the irreverent and wildly silly antics of Monty Python. The first time I was introduced to them was with ‘The Holy Grail’ and then by my mom’s records of their recorded sketches. I would listen to them over and over again laughing my tiny butt off as they discussed eating a man’s mother instead of burying her, burning her, or dumping her in the Thames. I practically died laughing about a certain cat detector van and the trials and tribulations of Miss Anne Elk. I appreciated that adults enjoyed being weird and that my sense of humor was not alone in the universe.

9. The Simpsons

With ‘Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire’ in 1989 was my first exposure to The Simpsons (I was 6 and this was their first full length episode). I still have it recorded on VHS somewhere in a box full of mostly unmarked VHS tapes that I refuse to give up for some reason. There isn’t much that I can say or add to the discussion as to why The Simpsons was so important for me. Those who grew up with it know how diverse, cutting, deliriously hilarious it can be. It remains my favorite show of all time and I wouldn’t have been the same without it.

8. Swimming in the Creek

I came alive on the banks of the Conodoguinet creek, a Native American name meaning ‘A Long Way with Many Bends’. Unbeknownst to me at the time, but this name was a metaphor for my life. In the summer I would splash around in its cool waters, sometimes catching crayfish, sometimes flattening my back and letting the current drift me down along the bends in the river, until I would get out and walk back home. I found a tree that had hollowed out, and I would hide my toys in there and climb to the top to look out at the world. Everything seemed gigantic and it was always changing, always bending.

7. Learning to Let Go with Baby Birds

A few times growing up I would find a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest. I felt responsible for the life of that bird and we would take it in, fill a shoe box with leaves and grass as a bedding, and feed the bird baby food through a dropper. I had one starling that once able to fly would do so throughout the house and would land on your shoulder when you called it. We could even take them outside and most times they would come back. But eventually they would get the urge to fly away, and though it always made me sad to let them go, I knew it was for the best. I could never hold them captive because I knew if I had the ability to fly free I would never want someone to hold me down because I couldn’t think of anything that could be more a symbol of true freedom than that. It helped me understand the importance of taking the good from what you have for as long as you have it and to carry that on once it is gone.

6. Long Summer Nights

Growing up in the country afforded me a lifestyle that was unrestrained from much outside force. Everything felt alive and free and summer nights were the epitome of that. Sitting on the porch and watching a storm roll through, or seeing a field glow with fireflies. I can remember the long nights where friends would spend the night and we would tent out in the backyard, loaded up with sugary drinks and youthful energy.

My favorite part of those nights would be staring up for hours into the night sky, which at the time was not polluted by man-made lights. I would gaze up at the millions of stars and wonder and dream.

5. Getting Lost

In the time before everything revolved around TV and the internet, the most important thing would be what adventure you could get into outside. Those journeys would sometimes get you into trouble when you would look around and nothing was familiar. It was then when you had to use your own ingenuity to find your way back. Even when panic would set in it was a way to learn yourself, how you dealt under pressure, and when you made it back you felt stronger because of it.

4. Everything’s Recorded on Cassette Tape

I had a tape recorder growing up. And the narcissism of youth allowed me to record many moments of that time. Some were just me making silly observations about what was going on, singing, recording thunder storms, or just being a big goofy dumbass with some friends. We would pretend like we were DJ’s on some radio station and I would play records and hold the tape player up to the stereo to record. It was silly but fun and every once and awhile I will pop one of those tapes in and listen to it like an audio time capsule that takes me back immediately to that place.

3. Make Believe

Pretending is something we take for granted the older we get. But we forget how important it was. How we had the ability to create anything within our minds and picture it in front of us. We had the power to transform reality and to make it our own. To take ourselves to other lands or other worlds, to be whoever or whatever we wanted to. It was like a lucid dream that we controlled. Somewhere along the way we lose sight of it and we become grounded in this world, but we should never forget that we still have that power within us.

2. The Great Outdoors

I’m taking this from another post I wrote which you can read in full here

https://kloipy.wordpress.com/2013/03/04/how-to-walk-in-the-woods/

I think it captures what I want to say the best

Remember beauty. Most importantly remember that you are alive. You may or may not have one chance here so best to enjoy it while you have it. Look at the world around you and see it for the majestic beauty that it truly is. This construct of life, that is just as alive as you are, is always around us. We become so enveloped in the grand scale that we rarely stop to appreciate the intense beauty that is in the everyday around us.

As long as I have a means to walk, I will. I will retain the earth that lives inside of me.

1. My Parents

When you become a parent, you realize just how much of an effect your parents had on your own life. How important a job it is to be parent becomes clear. I feel lucky to have had the upbringing and parents that I had, to which has made me the man I am today.